I don’t want to tell you my secrets

February 2, 2019 2 min read

I don’t want to tell you my secrets

February 2, 2019 2 min read

grey-bed-with-fairy-lights

I don’t want to tell you my secrets. And I don’t want to know yours.

I don’t want to reveal my trauma, my darkness, my sadness. I don’t need to know your fears, your hopes, your lifelong dreams.

I don’t want to know your middle name and you don’t need to know mine. I don’t want to meet your friends. I don’t want to book a weekend away.

I don’t want to have to fret about how I look or what I wear or whether I should have my hair up or down. I don’t want to go out of my way for you.

I want you to fit around my life, and me around yours. No sacrifice necessary.

I don’t want to have deep and meaningful conversations about the future, because I probably don’t want one with you. And you’re okay with that too.

I want you to fuck me, and then leave. A drink first, maybe, to pluck up some courage and boost my confidence. I want to be touched, softly or not. Kissed, softly or not.

Objectify me, a little. I can take it, because I’ve never had it. You don’t presume to know anything about me, and I like it. I always feel so known, so judged, before anything has even begun.

You’re not a cunt, obviously. I have your respect, and your desire, and that’s all I need.

You’ll owe me nothing.

I don’t need you, I just want you.

The world makes out like you’re so easy to find. Maybe if I looked how the world expects me to, you would be.

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About Me

About Me

Hi! I'm Sophie.

Writer, thinker, often overwhelmed.I like to talk about film, feelings and feminism. Not necessarily in that order.

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  • Thank god for @hbensonx 💜
  • Sleepy baby sunbathing 💔 (she clawed me across the face earlier, do not let this cuteness fool you)
  • I (mostly) stopped wearing makeup months ago and it’s been a game changer. It sounds stupid, but when I see this in the mirror, it actually feels like my face now, rather than what I look like in between coats of foundation. Plus I get an extra 20 minutes of sleep every morning. Why didn’t I do this sooner?
  • Cancelling your hair appointment and using the money to buy a new lens instead = solid life decision.
  • Here’s my cute chubby face to tell you a couple of things: 1️⃣ I had the best weekend with @kimhigson being the most me I have ever been, watching some incredible live netball and finally seeing Avengers: Endgame (still processing), and 2️⃣ My photos from my dreamy trip to Sweden are all edited and live on my photo account @sophslens_, or you can swipe to see a few. Thanks @mathew_curran for snapping this one ☺️📸
  • Hot chocolate break with @mathew_curran before we hunt down more photo opportunities - and meatballs, obviously. 🇸🇪
  • My mum got me this lady cushion and I LOVE it
  • Gripping, poetic, and consistently lightbulb-inducing as it explores a world where women rise to power, I couldn’t get enough of this book. I haven’t read fiction in years, but this reminded me that I ought to, much more often.
  • From Icelandic winds to sunny Spanish rooftops; quite the climate change, but I’m not complaining ☀️ Swipe to see some of my favourite photos from Malaga so far, or I’ll be posting the full set over at @sophslens_ 📸

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